Self- Actualization, Masculinity and the Pursuit of Strong Black Communities

“The devil often finds work for them who find none for themselves.”- Benjamin Whichcote. Laziness is a disease. It cuts across gender, educational levels, race, social class and political affiliation. Many folks are convinced that the pathogenicity of laziness can be acquired through how one is socialized. Those who are infected by this social disease soon become slaves to this condition. Laziness is a conditioning of the mind. Once our brains receive a particular message whether good or bad that message is stored forever in the brain’s database. Laziness is a process which occurs over time. Sadly, if this condition is not nipped in the bud it consumes the individual eventually. In any relationship there is a power issue, the same can be said about laziness being the master and those who allow themselves to be mastered are slaves to this disease. Can you imagine anyone in good health, having all their marbles intact yet refusing to work or unable to keep a job? Can you imagine a man with a family, who refuses to work or he is unable to keep a job? This is problematic and should raise a red flag, perhaps many red flags. I grew up in a nuclear family. Each morning my dad left for work and went to the garage; dad returned home in the evening. Our dad took care of his family. However, there is a category of men who prefer to stay home and sleep, play video games, and smoke marijuana and engage in idleness while their spouses go to work. This is clearly a reversal of gender roles. Historically, men are considered as the breadwinner who are suppose to bring home that proverbial bacon. Some men are satisfied with the women bringing home the bacon only for them to carve out the biggest slice. I would like to think that most men fall in the category of working and productive members of the society. Keith Hart, in the book Women and the Sexual Division of Labour in the Caribbean stated, “Generally men hunted larger animals, often over quite long distances, while women gathered plants and other foodstuffs from the area immediately near the camp.” He added, “one justification for such a division might be that men are stronger and faster; another that women’s mobility was hampered by young children whom they normally breast-fed for three years or more.” On the other hand women who work outside of the home have contributed to the interrogation of patriarchy as an institution established to keep women in the domestic sphere. The socialist feminist approach according to Roslyn Lynch speaks to the transformation or the elimination of the sexual division of labour. She argues this approach requires a restructuring, not only within the paid labour market; but also within the home; it involves the changing of labels in the socialization process which creates and maintains these labels. While there is definitely a need to challenge patriarchal issues we must be mindful that Jamaican masculinity among other things is grounded in the man’s primary role as provider. In the booklet, Why Man Stay So, one of the elements of manhood is financial provision for one’s family and family headship. The Genesis of Laziness. The genesis of laziness is rooted in the Tie The Heifer, Loose The Bull culture which is pervasive in many Afro-Caribbean societies. The gendered socialization of our children facilitates boys to have unchecked freedom without little or no responsibility in and around the home. Boys are given specific chores or duties On the other hand girls are carefully supervised and are given specific home duties. Sanctions are often applied to the girl child if she does not complete or refuses to do what many believe are the natural duties of a female, which is to take care of the home. This double standard regarding how we bring up our children and the subsequent irresponsible traits the boy child learns oftentimes handicap the male in functioning as a productive citizen. Laziness then is a function of nurture and therefore within our powers to rectify this social disease; many families have become dysfunctional as a result. There are some who argue that men who wear the label lazy have enablers to continue this ‘wukless’ lifestyle. Perhaps if the women in their lives told them from day one that this will not work chances are they would realize what time of day it is. Perhaps such women remain in those relationships out of a sense of obligation, or maybe its fear, or a false view of love; loving others more than they love themselves. Whatever the reason, men must work. Men, black men who spend most of their time smoking or engage in non-productive work are doing a disservice to the community and their families. Work does not necessarily mean outside of the home. There can be an arrangement or understanding that the man will do the housework, which is the laundry, cooking, tiding of the house, washing of dishes while the female work outside of the home. It cannot be right however, for the female to work outside of the home and return home to do the housework. There must be some parity regarding who does what. The Cambridge English Dictionary defines laziness as the quality of not being willing to work or use any effort. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines laziness as an inclination not to do work or engage in activities. Up Front and Personal. Deuane, a colleague of mine, married and a father of three, argues, the roots of laziness emerge from a loss of identity and emasculation (forced, systemic and traded). Emasculation is the process of making a man feels less than male by removing his sense of confidence and power. It is obvious that the inability for a male to hold down a job robs that man of his dignity and self worth. It is evident that some men have no qualm in deferring or handing over their manhood. Deuane added that some men trade their masculinity. What is masculinity? Masculinity is a set of attributes, behavioural patterns and roles which are associated with boys and men. We must be mindful that there are multiple masculinities. According to Australian sociologist Raewyn Connell, there is a hierarchical structure of masculinities in which the hegemonic type is ascribed by most men. As a result other men are marginalized if it is that they turn their backs on the hegemonic form of masculinity. The alpha male who is protective of his family and works to support his family would fall into this category. Deuane appears to be supportive of this view. He states, “Men who refuse to work usually exhibit strong passivity, cultured by dominance of feminine influence; the absence of masculine influence to shape the culture of work in their life as a child." He argues men in general learn best by modeling. The apprenticeship/vocational training were highlighted by Deuane as an example. Deuane added, “As the Bible puts it training up a child in the way he should go. We have to be deliberate in training or not training. This requires patience and wisdom; someone has to take them under their wings. The Construction of Black Masculinity. Among the strongest indicators regarding the construction of Afro-Caribbean masculinity are the smoking of marijuana and the drinking of liquor. Outside of the two mentioned indicators there is also sexual irresponsibility which is encouraged in the homophobic societies of the Caribbean. Deuane argues that most men are cultured into gangs early. The cultural blight that expresses itself in practices that destroy the psyche and ideologies that would foster growth and development; for us it is the marijuana, commonly called weed and the music. The Rastafarian cult, the predominance on smoking marijuana taken up by youths with drinking and the music provide a powerful psychotic mix that lures our men into worthlessness which equals laziness. Have we been effective at reaching our young men early enough to make wiser decisions and provide them with a skill to enable them to be functional and effective at developing themselves? Some men refuse to work as there are mental issues undiagnosed; some are plain lazy and are seeking the easy way out. They don’t want to apply themselves and work hard. Deuane concluded that the increased rise of women in all sectors will spur a greater decline as male modeling will be adversely impacted. Another colleague Miss Peart, (not her real name) did not mince words. “I would never enter a relationship with a guy who does not work or cannot keep a job. That’s a problem. You need to have job security. A woman needs a man who is able to take care of her personal needs, his needs and the entire needs of both of us. So I don’t see why I would get into a relationship. I consider that man to be a lazy man. He has poor work ethics, he needs to get himself sorted out and that’s a toxic relationship because no matter how important or interested you are in the intimate aspects a relationship. What women need is security and if he does not have a job then financially he is not going to be able to take care of you. So you are the only one who is going to be stressing, fitting your own needs, so what’s the use of having a man if he is not able to financially take care of you. Forget him! Miss Peart added, her ex husband, could never keep a job. It was very stressful. “He would be home, he got a job, the next three months he is back home. It was very hard on me, I felt I had to wear the pants; I had to take on the role of the man who is suppose to be the breadwinner." Miss Peart concluded, “I am a very Biblical woman. I believe what the Bible says that it is the man who should head the home and ensure that he takes care of his family.” As men we need to provide positive role models for our boys and younger men to emulate. We need to have more male teachers in our classrooms in order for boys to model the positive behaviour than can emerge from having more male educators in the education system. Women should not encourage the social disease of laziness or provide a safe haven for those men who refuse to work. The male sense of achievement oftentimes is derived from his ability to have and maintain a job. In the words of Edwin Louis Cole, being a male is a matter of birth. Being a man is a matter of choice. Wayne Campbell is an educator and social commentator with an interest in development policies as they affect culture and or gender issues. waykam@yahoo.com @WayneCamo ©